Art Didn’t Fix Us But it gave me somewhere to begin

I Drew My Mom During One Of Our Hardest Seasons

I almost didn’t write this.

Because what I’m about to say isn’t something you admit out loud. Not on Mother’s Day. Not when everyone around you is posting flowers, brunch photos, and gratitude.

But here it is.

There were Mother’s Days that made me uncomfortable. Not because I didn’t love my mom, but because our relationship was complicated in ways I didn’t yet have words for. And I carried that shame and guilt quietly.

During one of those seasons, I went to my ‘therapy’ place… Art.

I was having one of those hard days. Too many mixed feelings to make sense of. So I sat down and began to draw her.

As I drew, I began weaving words and flowers around her face. I wrote “Madre” and “Love” because it’s what is expected of a child. To love their mother.

Then I came across a quote that stopped me. “We are born of love. Love is our Mother.” It made me think my mom was the first experience of love I ever had. And that bond is expected to be compassionate, nurturing, forgiving, and patient. But it won’t always look sweet and kind. Love is more complicated than that.

So I filled the page with flowers. Because when I see flowers, I feel love. And that is what I wanted to feel for my mother.

What Gratitude Showed Me

Art held that space without judgment. And it gave me something I wasn’t expecting. To choose to see this woman through the eyes of gratitude. And that changed everything.

This woman left her country and children behind to go somewhere she knew no one and didn’t speak the language. She did this because she wanted to give her kids a better future, and if that is not love, what is? Let’s not forget how courageous this was!

Maya Angelou once said that people do the best they can with what they know. And I choose to believe that about my mom. Even when her actions hurt me.

It didn’t erase the pain, but it made room for compassion and acceptance.

Six Years Later

This drawing still sits unfinished after six years. But our relationship has transformed.

That’s what art can do. For me, it wasn’t therapy or journaling or a self-help book that cracked it open. It was a pencil and a blank page that created a space to be vulnerable without having to explain it to anyone.

That’s what I’m building in the Future Self Portrait program. A space for women who are ready to stop carrying what no longer serves them and start creating the story they want to live.

If this Mother’s Day feels complicated for you, know you’re not alone. You don’t have to figure it out in your head. Sometimes you can just pick up a pencil to reflect, to release, and to create a new story where love gets to mean something you define for yourself.

Details on the Future Self Portrait program coming soon. Stay close.

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